So I got this big booklet printed on cheap paper in the mail today filled with information about the upcoming propositions for California. I’m kind of sick of reading Monetary Policy stuff and my other books haven’t come in the mail yet, so I decided to take a break and read this thing. I wonder if they have as extensive information for the candidates that vote for candidates that votes for candidates that eventually votes for a candidate who votes for a candidate who votes for the president in China. Probably not.
But anyways, here’s how I’m voting so if you’re too lazy to read through this thing, then you can just copy my answers. Unless you usually disagree with the stuff I say on this blog. Then you can vote the opposite of what I will vote for.
Prop 1. High Speed Rail: YES
I like trains. When I was a kid, I got all these old toys from my cousin from New York. There were plastic dinosaurs, legos, transformers, and even a toy train set. Sadly, the toy train set required batteries and my dad was too cheap to give me any so I had to steal them from the TV remote. It was awesome. I also enjoyed riding BART to school back when I was too poor to afford housing in Berkeley. My favorite parts was when the train was above ground so I can have a nice view of Hayward, San Leandro, and Oakland. What clinched it for me were the train rides in China. Even the hard seaters. People talked to complete strangers, drank together, and we all made new friends on those long rides. I think cheap rail transportation in California is the way to go. Especially if we can bring our bikes onto the train.
Prop 2. Humane Farming: NO
They’re gonna get eaten anyways. If people want their KFC chicken to have flapped their wings before they died and dipped into a vat of oil, they could’ve gone and bought those organic chickens instead. But I can’t really take these kinds of stuff seriously.
Prop 3. Children’s Hospital Bonds: DUNNO
I’m torn. I hate kids and I hate hospitals, but I like the idea of kids being able to go to hospitals if they’re sick and stuff. I don’t know much about the state of children’s hospitals right now so I don’t know if more money for it is necessary. I’m kind of leaning towards a NO vote, but I’ll probably just leave this one blank.
Prop 4. Parental Notification of Abortion: NO
If a kid gets pregnant, they should be able to get an abortion without their hardcore conservative parents freaking out. It’ll save the family a lot of emotional trauma. Ok, so it’s not that simple, but I’m not a girl and I’m not a dad, so this prop doesn’t really apply to me yet. Once I get that sex change and get my age reversed so that I’m 13 years old again and then get pregnant though, I’ll probably vote NO. Guess I better make that appointment with the sex-age changing sperm bank…
Prop 5. Parole and Rehab: YES
The original idea of prisons, not dungeons, but the modern idea of prisons thought up by that 18th century dude from England, was that it would be a place of education and reform. We’ve gone really far away from that and have strayed into that eye for an eye punishment stuff. More money on parole and rehab would be good. Though I doubt a drug dealer really will get reformed in rehab, it’s still better than sticking him in prison where he’ll get more hookups into the drug trade.
Prop 6. Money for the Police: NO
More money for the police? I mean even though there were a string of armed robberies in Oakland a few weeks ago, crime has been relatively low compared to when I was growing up in the early 90s. I don’t think the police really need all that much more money since they’re doing a decent job giving me biking tickets as it is.
Prop 7. Renewable Energy: YES
I like wind and solar power. Like when you drive east into the hills from Hayward, there are all these wind turbines all over the place. I think they’re pretty. Definitely better looking than those massive coal powerplants in Shanxi. I mean China is trying to invest in green energy so if the US didn’t follow, they would definitely be losing a lot of international street cred.
Prop 8. Eliminate Same Sex Marriage: NO
I think homosexuals, gays, lesbians, faggots, dykes, or whatever else left or right or moderate people call them should be able to get married since it doesn’t hurt me in any way and if God really does hate homosexuals, then they can receive their punishment after they die. I mean God apparently doesn’t like atheists either, but I don’t see any laws prohibiting the belief in nothing… yet…
Prop 9. Victims Rights: NO
This prop seems to be based on movies where this wife beating husband is sent to prison but then gets out on bail while the poor wife is hiding at home clutching a baseball bat at night waiting for the bastard to strangle her. I personally don’t know much about the parole system, but I somehow doubt this situation would happen too often.
Prop 10. Alternative Fuel Vehicles: YES
I want to buy an alternative fuel vehicle. Like in Back to the Future where DeLorean was outfitted with this fusion generator where it can turn bananas peels into fuel… oh wait, it only provides power for the flux capacitor while the car itself still ran on ordinary unleaded gasoline. Well, I bet if this prop existed when that movie was made, the whole car could have run on fusion and they wouldn’t have had to go through all that trouble in Back to the Future III pushing the time machine with a train.
Prop 11. Redistricting: DUNNO
Prop 12. Veterans Bonds: YES
I don’t really see anything wrong with it. It’s not like the state is giving tax money to veterans. They’re only getting loans, which should be given to veterans who can pay it back, so it’s all good.
So there we go. Once China sends me their booklet on propositions, I’ll post up what I think on those as well on this blog.
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